"Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another, 'What! You too? I thought I was the only one.'" ~ C. S. Lewis

Wednesday, April 21, 2010

Retail Ruminations

Ha! I totally missed the fact that this Wednesday fell on "R" day! How perfect!

Lucy Lately Award:

We received a Customer Survey Feedback where the customer complained that we had almost no children's Easter books and she was very disappointed. We were quite stymied by this complaint, since we had had an entire table filled with both Easter and Passover books covering everything from the Easter Bunny to Jesus' Resurrection to Seders.

Then one of my coworkers looked at the date the customer had visited the store. Yeah, we probably didn't have many Easter books a week and a half after the holiday.

Apparently the Easter Bunny was running late at their house.

Caffeine Deficiency Award:

A woman came up to the cafe counter and asked if anybody had turned in a set of keys. There was nothing in the cafe, so the walkied the rest of us, but no one had turned anything in. The woman stood there insisting that she had only been to the cafe, so her keys had to be there. The barista asked us again. We checked around information, but couldn't find anything. The woman kept insisting that they had to have them somewhere.

Then she paused, walked over to the garbage can and looked inside. Yup. There were her keys. She had thrown them away by accident.

Because this is where I always keep my keys so no one else will take them.

Most Annoying Award:

One of my coworkers, J, was helping a customer when a man came up. He asked where the puzzle books were. She asked him to wait a moment while she finished with the other customer. When she was done, J turned to him and said, "You were looking for puzzle books?"

"Puzzle books! Puzzle books!" he bellowed. "What are you, deaf, lady?"

She should have been wearing this shirt.

Books That Frighten Me Award:

I don't know which scares me more: the fact that this book even exists,
or the fact that it's in the bargain section.

Well, that's it for today, kids. Tune in next week for some more retail craziness.

And don't forget to enter my contest! This is the last day for entries so clickety click your way onto the owl picture up top and I will reveal the winners soon. (I'm thinking of roping my brother, Dave, into helping me pick the winners in a ridiculous way, so it might take a couple of days for me to get them up. But have patience dear readers - if I do, it will totally be worth it :)


Raquel Byrnes said...

I like your posts...but I love your comments. Very funny. The surgical book in the bargain bin kinda scares me too. Hope your MC ends up the way you like her.

See you during the blogfest!

Readerly Person said...

Your Retail posts are the awesomest! :)

- Rebecca

Prewsw: a small shrubbery, first used in Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Unfortunately "prewsw" was too hard for the knights to pronounce, hence "shrubbery".

Shannon said...

The surgical book definitely worries me too! The customer looking for puzzle books was rude, I agree!

KarenG said...

What is it about the retail environment that turns people insane? And I'm not talking about the employees. It's clear what drives them crazy.

Palindrome said...

oooh, I want that surgery book!!! I love watching surgeries and reading weird medical books and by love, I mean secretly am disgusted by, yet still entertained and fascinated.

The Alliterative Allomorph said...

That surgical book! Ummm ... I'm speechless ...

Shannon O'Donnell said...

OMG! This entire post was just too funny!! :-)

Falen said...

I NEED that surgery book!
For reals, it would be awesome to have in any sort of apocalyptic situation.

Alexandra Crocodile said...

Hello! I just discovered your blog, and I really like it! So I am your lates follower. And I might just join your contest too - those owls are TOO cute:)

sarahjayne smythe said...

Hee! I love this post. It made me laugh. :) Thank you.

Jemi Fraser said...

Oh goody - a bargain surgery book - just what I needed! :)

Al said...

I need that surgery book.
No, seriously I do!
It's for research.

Alyson said...

Bargain surgery book, score! I will admit that I've accidentally thrown my phone away. It was on my food tray and I realized it as soon as I put the tray in the pile. Luckily it landed on top and I didn't have to dig through the garbage. And I certainly did not hassle the staff to find it for me. ;o)

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

@Raquel: aw, thanks. I'm excited about the several upcoming blogfests :)

@Rebecca: weird typing my own name. *blushing* and Monty Python FTW! bwa hahaha

@Shannon: People are crazy, what can I say.

@KarenG: My sister and I have decided that People morph into "Customers" and become completely different creatures. Like werewolves.

@Palindrome, Falen, Jemi and Al: If you ever win a contest I might just have to throw it in as a bonus. :)

@TAA: Yeah, me too. (I was gonna shorten it to AA but that didn't look quite right)

@Alexandra: Hullo! I will have to reciprocate the visit :) Glad you liked your visit!

@sarahjayne: Your mighty welcome

@Alyson: Yeah, I didn't have a problem with her throwing it away, it was with her insisting we had to know where it was. Crazies. :)

Joan Crawford said...

I'm with Falen I have to have that surgery book! That is an unbelievable bargain - you might really have to use it some day...like on an island if the actual doctor is too busy crying!


SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

@Joan: bwa hahaha! I wonder if there's anything in there about counting to 5?

Jessica said...

:-D That Surgery book totally made me spit out my food! We really carry it??? And man who thought of looking in the trash for keys, I sure wouldn't have haha!

Teebore said...

Yeah, we probably didn't have many Easter books a week and a half after the holiday.

Pfft, I bet you didn't even have any Christmas books, either. Jeez. ;)

Your story about the keys reminded me of one of my great retail puzzles. Our lost and found is stuffed, STUFFED with keys. How does one lose their keys and not know it?

When you walk out to your car and you can't unlock it because you lost your keys, do you just hop a bus to go home? Why don't you come back for the keys?

Why don't we have a rash of abandoned cars in the parking lot to match the abandoned sets of keys in the lost and found?

I just don't get it; even if one carried a spare set of keys on them, the fact that they needed the spare set should have told them they lost the original set.

SonshineMusic i.e. Rebecca T. said...

@Teebore: I know! That always puzzles me to no end! How on EARTH do you NOT realize you lost your keys before leaving the mall? I don't understand!

Teebore said...

I'm glad you're as confused by it as me. I thought maybe I was missing something...