Tuscan Tales WINNER!

Hi all!

And thanks for perusing my adventure to Italy! So many of you left comments and at least pretended to be interested in the fact that I was inundating you with pictures and random facts :)

So thanks to all of you and I'm so glad to have a little time so I can bounce around and visit all y'all again!

But wait, someone here is a winner, yes?  A winner of the fabulous Italy prize pack and the Italy owl, yes?

So.... according to Random.org, the winner is...

Yeah! Sarah Ahiers wins!

Sarah, I already have your address (because I'm a stalker that way) so as soon as I finish the owl your little package will be on its way :D

Thank you all for entering and I've had so much fun this past week! Hope you have too!

NaNo Owlie WINNER!

Hi everyone!

Thanks to all who entered my contest. I had SO much fun reading all of your crazy stories, etc. and I am very proud to announce the winner of happy little Nano....

Yeah! Nano can't wait to go to his new home!

... is ...

LOLA SHARP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yeah! *throws confetti, passes around cookies*

So e-mail me your address and Nano will be on his way!

Those of you still waiting for your very own owl, keep your eyes open. You never know when I'll have the urge to toss out another contest!

Another Owl Contest!

Yes, you heard that right. I am giving away yet another one of my trademark owls!

This is a very special giveaway for some very special people.

Now you may not think you qualify, so make sure you read the rules before you huff away in disgust at not being able to enter the contest*

This giveaway is for NaNoWriMo WINNERS!

WAIT!

I told you not to huff away. Okay, listen up.

Did you finish your 50,000 words in the month of November? You're a WINNER!
Did you write anywhere between 1 and 49,999 words in the month of November, but couldn't finish for any number of reasons? You're a WINNER!
Did you cheer on friends that were doing NaNo, even though you knew there was no way you could manage it this year? You're a WINNER!

All the rest of you can huff away now. I promise I won't be offended**

So, if you are a NaNo WINNER! then you have the chance to be a SonshineMusic Owl WINNER! too!

Aww... isn't Nano adorable!? He's got a winner flag and a pencil

and a slightly cockeyed expression from writing so much in a month!

All you have to do is comment on this post to enter. School is going to eat my face off this coming week, so this is going to run until next Friday night - the 17th of December.

In your comment entertain me with a tale of your NaNoWriMo experience. If I laugh out loud I will totally give you a bonus entry***

Also, please feel free to steal the picture of little Nano to invite other people to enter and you're welcome to Tweet or Facebook or Blog or Sidebar, because I want to spread the NaNo love!

That's it! go forth and enter and win some owlage.

*because I know that would be your first reaction
**as long as you aren't offended by me
***I am dead serious about this. I need the laughs when I'm in the middle of my 15 page research paper, 8 page final and 30 page case study.

We Have a Grand Prize Winner!

And one last giant thanks and a group hug

To the wonderful people that entered our

Both here and over at Naomi's blog! We had so much fun and we hope you guys did too :D

So, without further ado, the winner of our Grand Prize Pack including:

Plus a copy of Michelle Zink's second book Guardian of the Gate Plus an OWL Plus a SEKRIT SURPRISE

is

Drum roll please:

Untitled

by

Rosie from East For Green Eyes

and she's having her own contest right now, so go check it out!

A moving van was parked in front of the brick house next door. Too much was at stake with these new neighbors. The noise caused an earthquake in my chest. I threw the curtains closed and put the chain on the door.
The old colonial had remained empty for a year, and you couldn’t blame the bad housing market. The stories had traveled far enough. The real estate agents couldn’t protect the value of the property. Most potential buyers get turned off by the idea of replacing the floorboards beneath blood-stained carpets.
But my curiosity got the better of me. Leaning over the back of my La-Z-Boy, I pulled the curtain back, barely an inch of glass visible to my eye. The movers were pulling couches and desks from the van, and lugging them up the steep lawn. Nothing seemed abnormal. Even the new neighbor—standing by the front steps, telling the movers where to take each piece of furniture—gave off an air of normalcy.
Until his eyes turned and stared directly at me.
“What’re you…?”
I screamed, jumped, and dropped the curtain. “Josh!”
He rolled his eyes. “You were spying on the new neighbors, weren’t you?”
“No.”
“Sis, you’re full of crap. Why are you being so weird?”
I rubbed my shoulder, feeling the tingle of my scar beneath my sleeve. I’d never told anyone about my “date” with the previous neighbors’ son—or at least beyond what they expected. Movie and dinner.
I just hadn’t known I was on the menu.
“I’m not being weird!”
“Oh, whatever,” he replied. “First, you try to tell me the Franklins are cannibals. Then you start rumors that keep the house from selling. And now you’re spying on the new neighbors. What do you think? They bought it because of your childish lies?”
“No.”
He punched my shoulder, barely missing the scar he didn’t know was there. “You’re a sucky liar.” He spun around and dashed upstairs.
I sunk into my chair. Was I overreacting? Was it unreasonable for me to worry that the new neighbors might have a son my age? And he might act normal? And I might like him? And he might ask me out? And he might invite me in after the date when his parents were gone for the weekend?
And he might try to eat my arm? And his parents might have been home despite the lie? And I was supposed to be dinner?
A shiver ran down my back. I had never told anyone what had happened. I’d driven myself to the next town, told them I was a runaway, and asked them to patch up my shoulder. How could I have told anyone, even my parents? “Oh, gee, mom, I know you like Billy, but did he mention his favorite meats are pork and humans?” Josh making fun of me was enough. I didn’t need my folks checking me into the loony bin.
A noise reverberated around me, making me jump again. But it was just the echo of the garage door’s motor. After a minute of steadying my breath and trying to meditate my blood pressure back to normal, my mother came inside.
“Oh, honey, I’m glad you’re here. I thought we could take some of your cookies to the new neighbors. What do you think?”
So much for that meditation! “Um…”
She disappeared into the kitchen, and began loudly rummaging through drawers. “Come on, Angela. You’re not shy. I would think you’d want to meet them.” She reappeared in the doorway, a paper plate in one hand and a roll of plastic wrap in the other. “I think I saw a boy over there this morning. He looked about your age.”
Did she just throw a rope around my neck and pull? Why can’t I breathe? “Really?” I squeaked.
She smiled, mistaking my fear for excitement, and disappeared into the kitchen again to arrange her welcome goodies.
As she walked through the living room, sugar cookies mounded on the plate, the look she gave me said I had no choice. With a silent sigh and trembling knees, I trudged behind her across the lawn.
The freaky guy who had seen me in the window smiled widely, probably considering us hors d’oeuvres. “Oh, how nice of you to bring us a snack.” He examined the plate. “If you don’t mind, can I ask if you used butter for these?”
I frowned. “Uh, yeah. Why?”
His smiled turned apologetic. “We’re vegans. We don’t eat butter.”
I stared at him, letting this sink in. Vegan? “You never eat meat?”
He shook his head. “My son’s never tasted it at all.” He yelled through the door. “Kamil!”
A moment later the son came through the door, radiating hotness.
Damn, am I glad he’s not a cannibal!

DrWhat did we love about this story? A lot of things. It told a great story in a very short amount of space. We both loved the voice of the character, particularly in her exchange with her brother and the list of internal questions culminating in And he might try to eat my arm? Naomi really liked the line He punched my shoulder, barely missing the scar he didn't know was there. And the line Did she just throw a rope around my neck and pull? Why can't I breathe? was one that caught my attention.

The cannibal prompt was definitely a favorite!

So CONGRATS TO ROSIE! E-mail me with your address and as soon as the owls are finished your package will be in the mail!

Everyone else, go check out her blog. I'm new there myself, but it looks like a lot of fun!

And if you didn't see the 2nd or 3rd place winners, keep scrolling down for some more fantastic reading!

Come back tomorrow when Naomi and I talk about some of our favorite things from the other entries!

We Have a Winner! 2nd Place!

Here we go!

Again, thank you to everyone that entered the

Naomi and I really had such a fun time reading all of the stories. We read them all first and then talked about which ones we liked best and we agreed completely on all three. It was a blind reading, so we wouldn't be prejudiced.

But enough about the process, you just want to know who won the second set of fabulous prizes, right? They included the following books:

Plus an OWL and a SEKRIT SURPRISE (which I still haven't figured out) *headdesk*

But I will!

and the second place winner is

*cue fan fare*

Don't Worry, Be Happy

by Hannah! aka Palindrome

(she's on a lucky streak for pete's sake!)

I woke up on the wrong side of bed that morning. I mean, the wrong side of bed when you roll over and realize that one side was against the wall and meet the concrete with your face. Yup. Wrong side of the bed. I could already tell it wasn’t going to be a good day. I jump in the shower and scream oh-god-there’s-a-spider-on-my-face because OH GOD! There was a giant hairy eight-legged arachnid skittering around in the bottom of the tub. You should never have to meet that kind of terror while in the buff. That thing looked like it could climb right back out after being drowned so I showered with one eye on the drain.
I turned on the TV to watch the news while I got dressed. I surveyed my outfit in the mirror. An extra 30 minutes on the treadmill would be added to the count tonight.

“Aaaaah!What in holy hell?” My legs were trapped in a burning vice. I didn’t think the pants were that tight. I scrambled to pull them off. My ankles stayed trapped in denim handcuffs as I looked down and spied blisters everywhere. Gross! I guess I would have to resort to a long skirt today. Cue exasperated, if somewhat pained, sigh. I finally found the correct combination to break from the chains of my skinny jeans. (Note to self: stepping on one leg of the pants while tugging opposite foot is the key.) I did a little dance once I was free, which was soon followed by a wince from burning flesh.

By the time I finished dressing my eyes were watering. An eyelash decided to escape and poke me when I wasn’t looking. It quickly burrowed under my lid and behind my eye. No matter how often I blinked and drilled my finger into my lid, it stayed hidden. The fight only resulted in screwing up my TV. Flickering channels, burning legs, giant spiders, vengeful eyelash and a concrete wall to the face, so that’s how the day was going to be.
I grabbed a ready cup of coffee, a pair of sunglasses and a pile of bills to sort through on the deck. It was a beautiful morning. The sun was warm and friendly casting my shadow back against my house. Hello, Sun! I lowered myself onto a chair and took a sip of bitter steaming java. I was able to enjoy my morning for 2.5 minutes before a moving truck growled into the driveway next door.
The house had been empty for months and that delighted me to no end. Well, there’s my end…or rather the end of my solitude. My curiosity won the battle against my need for privacy so I stayed where I was. I sifted through papers and envelopes unfocused. I was rewarded with a deep oozing paper cut.

My eyes kept drifting to the truck. Moving men moved in and out of the barren house. A large man stood alongside a string of a woman shouting rooms at the boxes disappearing inside. “Living room! Bathroom! Kitchen! Den!”

The sun was against me now and blinded me from seeing anyone clearly. My stomach boiled and splashed so I decided to drag myself inside to throw some food down my gullet. I continued to glance while cooking until everyone disappeared into the house. And after several hours the moving truck was still there. That’s odd. They didn’t seem to have that much stuff.
After satisfying my hunger, I returned to the deck, determined to concentrate on my bills. I scanned my bank statement until I heard a loud yelp. I mean, it really sounded like a yelp.

“YELP!” There it was again.

Someone was trapped beneath a large armoire calling for help but with wood crushing your sternum, I’m sure it would sound like yelp. But with my luck, I was leery.

“Ah. Oooch-eee-owww!” The grass stabbed at my feet as I tiptoed to the fence bordering their house and peered through. I could see directly into their bare dining room window. Again the sun was waving and saying hello like a slightly stupid man while obstructing my view.

I could barely make out the people surrounding a large dark table. They were already set up for dinner. How nice. Then I noticed what was on the table. One of the movers was sprawled out and bloody. A cloud distracted the sun for a moment and the window cleared. There were four people around the table and each was chewing on a limb of the mover.
I would have called for help but instead, choked and gagged on the bank statement I had shoved in my mouth in fright. Great, now I need to call the police and the bank.

What did we love about this piece? First off, we thought it was hilarious how she managed to work in most of the prompts in a coherent story arc. Naomi and I both loved the last line. The rest of it was great, but that last line was a killer!

So congrats to Hannah! All of you should check out her blog, because she is hilarious and if you follow her you can make her muse dance :)

If you didn't see the 3rd place winner yet, check below! Lindsey's story is sure to make you laugh as well. And tune in tomorrow for the Grand Prize Winner! *loud cheering*

We Have A Winner! 3rd Place!

Yeah! Thank you to everybody that entered our

Also thank you for your patience. I had originally scheduled this to end before school started, but with my vacation and everyone else being away I extended it and then oops extended it again, because life ate my face off.

Anyhoodle (as Mia would say)

All of the entries were great fun to read and we enjoyed hosting this contest so much!

People actually entered so we don't feel like lame-sauce because you all are awesomesauce!

All right, enough corniness...

Naomi and I have chosen the winners and we decided to roll them out (like Sarah/Falen did on hers) so each winner gets the recognition they deserve!

So third place, with the wonderful prizes of:

Plus an OWL and a SEKRIT SURPRISE (which is sekrit, because I kind of haven't figured out what it will be yet)

Is the story I am calling (since the author left it untitled) -

"Shady Acres"

by Lindsey aka Dangerous With a Pen

WOOT! (you finally got your owl :)

Different palates appeal to different people. It’s only natural. Some people don’t like anchovies. Some people love to mix peanut butter and chocolate. Some people are vegetarians. I guess you could call me a humanitarian.

Evil tastes good. Oh come on, it may be crass, but it’s just so spicy. Tangy. Tasty. Good people just taste bland. Back when my tastes moved toward people, I started with homeless, runaways… people who wouldn’t be missed. When I became more skilled, I told myself it was only right to consume those who brought darkness to the world. Yeah, it was my way of rationalizing a bad habit, like an alcoholic. But when the glossy Shady Acres mailing arrived yesterday… oh, it was just too easy. So much evil. Old, slow evil that has marinated for so long… Acres and acres of shady folks with their guards down…

Cru

Living here has been good for me. Shady Acres is… an “active adult community” (chuckle) not exactly the type of place you’d expect to find someone like me, but I guess that’s part of its draw. There comes a point in life, when you get to my age, where the legacy that you have worked a lifetime to build becomes too heavy a mantle. When you no longer have the energy or the desire to dye your hair or trudge around in fur coats, but after creating that persona, you can’t exactly throw it all away by showing up at the local SafeWay in sweatpants. Excuse the dramatics, but if you haven’t walked in my shoes, I can only compare the weight of carrying a legacy to the burden of Atlas. At some point, you just want to let the gray hair grow and sit around in slippers drinking tea rather than chasing fool puppies.

The best thing about Shady Acres is that once you’re in, you’re in. If you can get your application past this board, you are certified, bona fide evil. Your place is permanently etched in villainry, which means that you don’t have to go proving yourself to anyone else in here. We’ve got that hag with the poisoned apple, the fella who rode round Sleepy Hollow waving his head around, you name it. And none of us traipses around in our old fool villainous getups or puts on a show. We look more like early bird time at your local diner. And no one cares. Like I said. We’ve all made it. Nothing to prove, and no energy left to prove anything, anyway.

I remember you, you’re that crazy dalmation lady. With the name – De Mille? De Ville? The director or the car, I forget. Doesn’t matter. Anyone who skins puppies has to have the spice I’m looking for. This real estate lady here, showing me around, is pointing to each house and telling me who lives there, but what I’m hearing is each brand of evil and what I’m seeing is a buffet – but instead of veal, lamb, chicken, it’s theft, murder, and… whatever you’d call skinned puppies. I wonder for a moment if she notices the crazed look in my eye when she moves on to each tender new morsel, tempting my taste buds with one depravity after the other. But no, crazy eyes are the norm around here. I almost squeal with glee! There are a few empty houses, but they are going fast. Which perversion would you like to live next to, sir?

Mal

A week after I got the Shady Acres brochure in the mail, I put my dilapidated old castle on the market and my plan in motion. I’d only been hanging onto that place for sentimental reasons, anyway, you know? It was way too big for one person. Besides, we’re in a recession, don’t you know? The heating bills alone were ruining me. It’s not like I cared about that stupid princess anymore, but I had to keep putting on the show with the raven and the blasted horned headpiece. Did anyone really think that after 16 years, I was still hung up on not getting invited to her christening? Yes, they probably did. You cannot possibly underestimate the conceit of royalty.

It was so easy, the whole spindle thing got the princess out of the way. I have to admit, it was fun becoming the dragon after all those years of creating that image in my head for my final bow, but have they really stopped teaching princes to actually check to make sure that dragons are dead when they fall over a cliff? I mean, really. It was almost too easy to slink away while he basked in his perfectly coiffed glory and ran off to kiss her. So here I am, finally able to relax, at last.

Mmm, lobster bisque…

Prompt: Be Happy That Your New Neighbors Aren’t Cannibals

Which, by the way, was a very popular prompt :) I guess you just can't beat cannibals for short fiction, huh? Almost as good as zombies...

What did we love about this piece? Well, the concept is hilarious - that there is this retirement home for all the evil people?! Ha! Cru cracked us up. Then the narrator - this horrid cannibal person eating evil people to assuage his/her conscience for being a cannibal! Ha again!

I particularly loved the line:

I guess you could call me a humanitarian.

Naomi liked the section where the cannibal is drooling over each "flavor" of evil as he/she is being shown around Shady Acres.

It made us smile, had great characterization and was well written.

Congrats Lindsey! I think I have your address somewhere, but e-mail me with it again so I have it for sure. I will (hopefully) finish up the owls this weekend :) If any of you haven't checked out Lindsey's blog, do so - she's Dangerous With a Pen (it says so right on her blog) and quite witty as well :)

1 MORE DAY!

So I was SURE that I had put through Thursday as the deadline for the contest, but apparently I wrote Tuesday here. But I MEANT Thursday, so you have one more day to get those entries in so you can win one of these:

Isn't it adorable?

Okay, so I haven't finished the owls yet, but when they're assembled they'll look something like this:

So cute, right?!

So hurry up and write your flash fiction. The rules are all HERE

And if you haven't yet, leave a comment on Naomi's contest HERE and enter to win pillows!

All right. I will make every effort to get a Retail Wednesday post up later today. If I finish my homework. Blah.

So excited to judge all this flash fiction! Whee!

WINNERS!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First off, I am SO sorry for the lateness of this post. I started it this morning, but the video took longer than I anticipated. And then YouTube kept freaking out and not posting it forever! But by then I was totally invested. So I tried posting it directly to Blogger. grr... But it's here! It's time!

Today is the day you have all been anxiously waiting for..... the revealing of my Fifty Fabulous Followers Contest Winners!

But first.

There is another contest you have to check out. Simon C. Larter hit 250 followers! (and it's no wonder. Have you read his Blog? No? Shame on you!) He's having The Most Epic Contest in the History of the Blogosphere, EVAR!*

One of the bonus things you can do to get cool points AND more entries into the drawing is write a poem in either iambic pentameter or anapestic tetrameter.

So here is my anapestic tetrameter masterpiece. Please hold your applause to the end:

If I start feeling bad on the day that's today

Now I know I can just find a mirror and say,

"I'm a follower, see, of Sir Simon's own blog!

So I am not a toad, and I am not a frog!

I am cool! I am hip! I know just what to do!

Because Simon C. Larter is awesomesauce too!"

And then I will quickly go back to my work

To be done and return and then quietly lurk

As I hit the refresher again and again

Waiting there for new content from Simon "Da Man"

Will it be some flash fiction that soon will appear?

Or some sarcastic humor I'm going to hear?

But it really won't matter what shows on my screen.

Be it i-am-bic pen-ta-me-ter on gangrene

Or a tale of a Scotsman imbibing some booze

Cause I know that whatever Sir Simon may choose

I will laugh and I'll snort and my beverage inhale.

That is always what reading his posts dost entail.

So I'm writing this poem, my tongue firmly in cheek

cause in just over one plus a half of a week

Simon's giving away lots of prizes, you see.

And I know that a winner is gonna be... me!
He will give you a squirrel or some vodka, it's true

Or perhaps he will jot down a poem about you!

So go enter his contest and do it post haste

For the clock's ticking down... there is no time to waste.

Okay, yeah, so it's not the greatest thing ever, but it was totes fun to write.

All right. Enough dilly dallying around. Let's get on with it!

One more thing. I have decided I hate doing contest drawings. I Lurve doing contests. I love finding new people and making owls for you all. I hate doing the drawing, because that means there are people who really want to win who won't... ;-;

I wish I was a bazillionaire and could mail you ALL happy little owls. But I guess that would kinda defeat the purpose of the contest, huh? Anyhoo. I'm depressing myself and this is supposed to be a HAPPY post!

(P.S. stay tuned at the end for news about a SUPER SISTER CONTEST!)

My brother, Dave, so kindly helped me with the drawing of the names. The video below shall reveal all!

Congratulations to the winners! Please e-mail me with your mailing information and your happy owls, silly books etc. will find their way to your house :D

(P.S. If you link to my profile, you can get the link to my e-mail address)

(P.P.S. If for some reason the video doesn't work, let me know and I'll post the winners in the comments.)

And thanks to all of you who left me owl poetry. I loved each and every one and I hope you don't mind, but I'm going to repost them here :) (in no particular order) (remember, theres' SUPER SISTER CONTEST NEWS at the end)

Mia:

Oh Grey and Fluffy friend.

You stole my aching heart

I'll be here 'til the end

And then we'll pick some flowers

I'll watch you fly above

And hope you don't attack

My head is full of love

And thinks your name is Dave

Jenn:

Amigarumi Owls…
I must have one!
Amigarumi Owls…
so much fun!

Amigarumi Owls…
made by Miss. Sonshine.
Amiaruimi Owls…
One of them must be mine!

Falen:

I'd like me an owl
to represent as mascot
my great writing group

Lola:

Girl owl of cuteness
likes to look at all the boys
on the other tree

Summer:

Owl, owl, soaring high
In the inky, pitch-black sky
Whose immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

Alyson:

With your big round eyes
and distinctive hoot,
critters say their goodbyes
and begin to scoot.

Dangerous With a Pen/Lindsey:

The coolest owl is
David Bowie in Labyrinth.
I MUST WIN AN OWL.

Readerly Person:

Owls stay out late at night
so they can read when the moon is bright
and laugh at literary fights,
then dream of fire-fly lit lights.

Teebore:

While a robotic
Bubo would be a great owl,
yours would be better.

Brown-Eyed Girl:

Green owl
Purple owl
Grey owl - OW OW! ;)

Shannon O'Donnell:

I could win an owl
my girl would be so happy
she loves them so much

AND NOW THE SUPER SISTER CONTEST NEWS!!!!!!!!!!

So, Naomi and I decided that when we each hit 108 followers (because 108 is THE number and bonus points to anyone who knows WHY), we will hold a massive 2-part contest extravaganza complete with flash fiction, drawings, amigarumi, books, us making fun of writing random stories about you and other as to now unknown awesomesauce prizes!

Aren't you excited?!

So if you are not a follower - cave to peer pressure and do it now! If you don't follow my sister, shame on you! She is awesomesauce (finals have eaten her life for now, but she'll be back in a few days) and you should go follow her now! (she has two blogs, but we decided to say "Writing: A Soul's Way of Breathing" will be the one we'll watch the follower count on.

I'm at like 81 (craziness!) so that's only 19 stalkers to go. Naomi is at 59 followers! So that's only 41 to go! We can do it!

Hip Hip Hooray!

This is now my official "I'm Excited, Let's Part-ay" picture!

I had SO much fun with my last contest I decided that as soon as I hit a mile stone with my followers I would have another one... I meant to do it at 50, but then, here I am - suddenly at 59! and amazed at all the wonderful people I've had a chance to meet.

Maybe it sounds like I'm gushing about this all the time, but you guys have no idea how incredibly blessed I am that you read (and then COMMENT on :D) what I put out there. I know I have been lacking in the reciprocal reading and commenting, but I warned you at "A" that April would be spotty for me. I am here and I do check in whenever I have a chance, I promise!

Anyhoo - that was a long intro to what will be a much more exciting topic... CONTEST PRIZES!

In celebration of all my wondermous (as opposed to WonderMouse) Not-So-Creepy-Stalkers, I am giving away not 1...

Not 2...

But 3! That's right 3! fantabulous gift packages!

If you are one of the lucky winners you will receive...

(drumroll please)

1 of these crazy venticular bookmarks!

Because everyone needs more bookmarks and these move when you turn them back and forth and because [honestly] they were on sale.

1 of these adorable pop up notepads! Sweet Muffins!

I know I am ALWAYS running out of note pad paper and these were just too cute to pass up.

1 copy of this book

Because everyone needs a good laugh every now and again and this book is funny without going crass, which is rare in humor books. And because I love supporting a guy who can only draw stickmen, but managed to get his art published. Oh what we will buy :)

AND.......

1 of these sweet little owl triplets!

Meet the grey owl. He can be a bit sensitive about his pointy head, but his sherbet colored tummy feathers make him happy.

Here's his brother, the brown and purple owl. His beak looks a bit like a duck's bill, but he thinks it gives him character.

The only girl of the batch, the green owl is shy, but very cuddly and would love to be a part of your family.

Don't you just want to take them all home?!

So, here's the deal

1. Be a Not-So-Creepy-Stalker (aka follower) of my blog - you have to show up in the follow list, not just follow via Reader or whatever, because I like to see the people that are stalking me. And this way I can stalk you! (Already a Stalker as of April 9 +2/ New Stalkers after April 9 +1)

2. Leave a comment on this post. Right down below, after I finish with everything here. Aren't you excited! (However if you leave a comment to the effect of "I hate owls and stickmen cause me to have nightmares" I will assume you don't want your name entered :P) (+1)

3. In your comment tell me your preferred order of owls - It won't guarantee that you'll get your favorite color, but if you particularly like one I'd like to try to pair you up with it if you win. If it doesn't matter, let me know that too :)

SO if you are a Stalker and leave a comment you get 2 or 3 entries! Sweet Muffins, wasn't that easy?! (btw these are required to enter the contest. Just to clarify)

But you want more chances to get your hands on one of those owls you say? Never fear, bonus points are here!

4. Bonus points for extra entries go like so:

a. Mention this in a blog post and link it here in the comments somewhere. If you want to leave a comment for your first entry and then linky-dink once you've done your post, go for it. (+1)

b. Post the contest on your sidebar and leave a linky-dink in the comments so I know. (+1)

c. Write me an owl poem and leave it in the comments. A haiku, a limerick, a sonnet, two rhyming lines, whatever. Let your creativity run wild! (+2)

d. For extra special cool points, be a follower of one of my sister's blogs, because she is awesomesauce and I think you'll like what you find over there. She can be seen dancing with a vacuum at Slumpvis Musings or muttering in Akkadian, Greek and Elvish at Writing: A Soul's Way of Breathing. (+2)

Which gives EVERYBODY a chance to get 6 more entries! (go ahead, do a happy dance, I won't tell :)

5. Finally, please add up your points for me in your comment so I don't lose my mind anymore than I already have :)

The contest will end on Thursday, April 22nd at 12pm EST so I have time to pick the winners and post it before I have to go to work that day :D

Have fun!

(And I know I am getting this up late, but today was crazy and I started it while it was still Friday, so it totally counts!)

Retail Wednesday With a Winner Reveal at the End!

I feel like I need a theme song or something. "Here it comes, walking down the street, it's just making fun of everyone I meet.. Hey, hey Retail Wednesday..." And that's about as far as I get.

anyways

On to our awards!

Odd Question Award:

Okay, so the question wasn't really THAT odd, it was more the way they went about asking for it. A mother and son approached me to ask if we had Native American short stories. I asked if they meant stories about them or stories by Native American authors. "I don't know," the mother shrugs. "It's supposed to be stories about oppression. But it has to be fiction." ?! She could give me no more information. I'm sorry, if you don't even know what you're supposed to be getting, then I sure don't!

Well, until you do, don't come running to me...

Captain Obvious Award:

Rainy weekends are fantastic for business. We are already a weekend store, but if it rains, then we are absolutely mobbed. Last Saturday was one of those days. The cafe was packed, the store was filled with browsers and we were all kept running nearly constantly. Early afternoon, after picking her way around several strollers, small children, hordes of adults and teeny boppers, a woman looks at me, points at the kids' room and announces: "It's a MESS in there!"

Most Annoying Award:

One of our baristas was running some magazines up to the register. On her way back to the cafe a customer accosts her, throws up his hands in the "Time Out" signal and says, "Hold on - time out! I'm looking for The Egyptian Book of the Dead.

Because this will make me want to help you...

Pulling Teeth Award:

Sometimes trying to get information out of customers is particularly difficult.

Example 1 -

Guy: Where is Personal Finance?

Me: (taking him toward the section) Are you looking for something specific?

Guy: The computer said it would be on Shelf L.

Me: (Boy do I wish that the computer didn't give shelf letters - we don't really use them.) Is there a particular book? We file them more by author than by shelf letters.

Guy: (gives me sarcastic look) Oh, really. Well, the author is *******

Me: What book are you looking for?

Guy: (perusing the shelf) You spell the name like this - * * * * * * *

Me: (WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE BOOK YOU MORON) Do you remember the title?

Guy: Yes, it's ______________.

Me: Here you go! (now just walk away)

Example 2

Woman: Do you have books on events?

Me: What exactly do you mean?

Woman: Like planning events.

Me: What kind of events? We have a couple books on like baby showers or wedding showers...

Woman: No just events.

Me: We don't really have anything just on event planning.

Woman: Well I bought one here before so I know you have them.

Me: Do you mean planning events like as a business?

Woman: Yes.

Me: Oh, okay. That would be in Small Business. (take her to the section, find the one book we have on it)

Woman: No, like wedding planning.

Me: (Well, maybe if you had said that in the first place we could have saved five minutes of both of our lives that we will now NEVER GET BACK.)

So true, Benjamin, so true...

Strangest Topic Award:

We had not one, but two people ask me in the same day for books on yoyos. I just thought it was rather odd for two people to ask that in such a short amount of time, but the real winner for strange topic this week was the woman who asked for our section on marionettes.

Why would you want books on these? CREEPY!

Book Rearrangement Award:

We have a history table near our biography section. When recovering I discovered not one, not two, not three, but FOUR Michael Jackson biographies sandwiched between various stacks of history books on the table. I'm really not sure what kind of statement they were trying to make.

Private Amusement Award:

A guy asked me if we carried any books on magic, like slight of hand. We don't have many, but I show him the ones we do have. He asks if we have any DVDs. I say, unfortunately no. He says, "I probably have to go to one of those crazy stores with the nutty people." Gives me a big, weird grin and walks away. Ummm.....

I know what I'd find - weirdo customers like this one.

Not the Brightest Crayon in the Box Award:

Yesterday we got a phone call. Customer wanted to know if we had a specific book. I was helping another customer place an order, so I passed the call off to a coworker. Later that day the customer comes in and asks another employee for the book. After she has looked for it for several minutes she asks me. I recognize the title and tell her to ask if it is the same customer that called to ask us to hold it. She does and it is. I shake my head. If he put it on hold, then obviously it would not be on the shelf anymore. So the customer heads up to the register. The cashier cannot find the book, so the coworker that helped him on the phone is asked if he set the book aside. Coworker looks at me strangely. "I told him we didn't have it."

Okay, so this picture has nothing to do with the story, but when I googled "don't have it" this came up and I had to laugh and then post it.

Densest Customer Award:

A coworker is standing behind the register, ringing up a customer. A girl leans across the queue line and hollers at him, "Excuse me, do you work here?!"

Usually if someone is standing BEHIND the register with that glazed look in their eyes, it's a pretty safe bet that they DO actually work at the store you are in. Usually.

And now onto the most important award of the day...

THE FANTABULOUS AMIGARUMI OWL AWARD!!!!!!!

*loud cheering commences*

I can't tell you how much I wish I could send each and every one of you an owl. It's been so much fun "meeting" all of you and I hope we have a long and fun blogging friendship ahead of us. So stay tuned because I'm sure I'll throw another one of these contests when I reach some other unplanned milestone.

So without further ado:

The "already a stalker" winner is:

And the "new stalker" winner is:

Congratulations to Joan Crawford and Erin!

E-mail me at sonshinemusic(at)gmail(dot)com with your mailing address and your happy little owl will find its way to your mailbox. (Erin, yours might be a little longer since he hasn't officially been born yet, but it will go out within a week)

Thanks to everyone for entering and posting and linking and everything!