Two for Tuesday: Stupid is as Stupid Does

Sometimes I have to laugh at my life, because things happen to me. Things that should only happen in a sitcom. Really.
People ask me if it's "too soon" to tease me about these things. In my opinion, it's rarely too soon to laugh at yourself. Because if you can't laugh, you're gonna cry. and laughing is ALWAYS the better option!

1. A couple weeks ago I was teaching my 1201 class. I had just split them up to do some group work and turned to go back to my desk.

FYI this is the floor in my office. So stylish, no? (sarcastafont engage!)

I happened to be wearing these shoes:
I love these shoes.
As I turned something happened that I could never ever duplicate. No matter how hard I tried.

I put the heel of the right shoe through the bow on the left shoe and BAM

crashed to the ground. Yes. Flat on my face in front of the class.

They all went dead silent and one of the boys jumped up to see if I was all right. I was fine, but the heel was still caught and it took me approximately 4 minutes to untangle it. Okay, probably more like 10 seconds, but it felt so much longer. I waved the student away and managed to stand back up.

But man was I totally self-conscious about my feet for the entire rest of the day.

As soon as I got back to the offices I had to tell my colleagues and we all laughed until our sides ached. I was glad to offer some levity to the day.


2. This Saturday I took the GRE Literature in English test. Talk about a brain implosion. 2 of my friends and I signed up to take it at the same location together so we could provide moral support for each other.

We finally found the room where we were supposed to take the test and the proctor, who was absolutely hilarious, started to get us into rows based on the test we were taking. Everyone was chatting as the proctor went around to check us in.

When she got to me my name wasn't on her list. So she checked her other list. Not there. So we looked at my ticket and I realised, to my horror, that whether I made a mistake or there was a computer glitch (a theory I strongly support as I swear I double and triple checked before signing up), I was registered to take the test at a different campus of the same school.

Yeah.

The proctor told me to take a deep breath and said she'd make a call to see what she could do for me. She pulls out her phone and the entire room goes deathly silent as she announce, "I've got a girl here who came to the wrong testing center. Can she take the test here?"

I am sure that my face went BRIGHT. RED. as everyone turned to look at me.

Fortunately I was able to take the test and it wasn't a problem. But after the proctor moved on I turned around and my 2 friends and I started cracking up as I threw up my hands and said, "Only me!"


How about you? Done anything hilariously stupid recently? Do tell, I could always use a good laugh!

Tell the Truth Tuesday: Things I've Learned

1. It is a bad idea to listen to the last disc of Bridge to Terabithia while driving to work and right after applying mascara.

2. There is nothing wrong with my tear ducts.

see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!

3. Years of watching sci fi has affected my brain. As soon as I heard the premise for Terra Nova I started trying to figure out how they could avoid destroying the time/space continuum. Dad and I decided that they must have slipped into an alternate dimension, which actually satisfied our desire for logic. Immediately after we decided this, the show went on to explain that this was exactly what had happened.

4. I have no problem with people going back in time as long as they move to another dimension so as to not disturb the space/time continuum.

5. I become addicted to Twitter when I have a stack of papers to grade. This both distracts me and has the added bonus of making me sound like a total whiner for several days.

From HERE

6. I was way too concerned that my class schedule would interfere with the tv shows I want to watch this fall. They don't and I'm absurdly happy.

see more Lolcats and funny pictures, and check out our Socially Awkward Penguin lolz!

So how about you? Any truths to share this week?

Tell the Truth Tuesday

Oh, the things I will do not to write anything with real content, but still consider it a blog post.

Hey, wait. I think that's truth #1 for today.

2- I am passive agressive. I am just coming to this realization. The customers coming into our store during this period of liquidation are BRINGING IT OUT IN ME.

3- I am also becoming more violent. In the past 2 weeks I have had intensely strong urges to: a) throw a book at a customer's head, b) dropkick a customer, c) stab a pen into a customer, d) use my words to wound

4- my new motto is: People are Stupid. This applies to an alarmingly large part of the populace

5- This blogpost is getting a little too honest

6- I am hoping some of the customers read this and feel terrible.

7- I should be ashamed of 1-6 BUT I'M NOT

8- I really am.

9- dear heavens someone please stop this diarrhea of the fingers

10- I have to have an even number for my list.

ahem.

So what is your truth for this Tuesday? Do tell!

Two Truths for Tuesday

Wow! Look at that! I've started back on my schedule again!

Try not to die from shock or anything. I've also started my bloggy rounds again, trying to get back around to you lovely people who haven't given up on me despite my spotty appearances and spastic posts.

So today, for my Two for Tuesday, I have once again decided to steal from the Roecker sisters and post truths as well.

1. I am enjoying my summer off of school a little too much. So much that when I had a day of work cut from this week I kind of didn't really care. It's been a lot of years since I had this amount of time on my hands and I think it's gone to my head. I wouldn't mind if I was actually like writing or something, but I'm not. And worse, I don't feel bad about it. Not really. Case in point. Yesterday I did the following:
a. sleep in until 10:30 (completely unheard of unless I am sick)
b. read the rest of Cruel Love by Kate Brian (my guilty pleasure in YA books)
c. try to log into my school account, which won't load
d. lose all desire to work on my syllabus
e. read 2 chapters of They Say/I Say to make myself feel like I am accomplishing SOMETHING
f. write my blog post about the winners of my Tuscan Tales contest
g. read some blogs
h. snicker over Sarah and LiLa's posts on procrastination
i. continue to read blogs
j. decide at 2:15 I should probably eat some lunch
k. slump around trying to find something to eat
l. put a frozen chicken and cheese quesadilla in the toaster oven
m. get the mail
n. dance around because I got notification that I was awarded a scholarship
o. decide to fill out the acceptance sheet later
p. hide award letter in room in order not to think about it
q. eat quesadilla while watching Torchwood on Netflix streaming
r. keep watching Torchwood
s. help Mom pick lettuce from our garden for dinner
t. watch more Torchwood
u. go to Wal-Mart with Dad to buy frozen pizzas
v. eat dinner with the family
w. read some more of Divergent
x. start another episode of Torchwood
y. get ready for bed
z. write this blogpost
As you can see. I have an entire alphabet's worth of stuff and nothing really productive. At all.

2. I didn't really know what to write about for today so I made a random list and am pretending that it is a real post and that I am NOT totally ripping off multiple other bloggers.

So what's your truth today? Are you feeling lazy now that summer is here? Or are you still busy, busy, busy?

It's a Tell the Truth Tuesday Extravaganza!

So the ever fabulous Lisa and Laura Roecker do this very entertaining post most Tuesdays where they admit some sort of hilarious truth. Maybe it's not supposed to be so hilarious as I find it, but I'm easily entertained. Also I can so see my sister and I in a few years every time I read a post.

But today they are doing something different and having us post our tell the truths on our blogs rather than in their comments. I figured, hey, WHY NOT.

so here goes:

1. My arm looks like something out of a bad horror movie called "Lizard Arm" or something. I just got my cast off from my thumb surgery and the skin is dry and peeling and... well, you get the idea.

2. I am writing this post in order to procrastinate reading more feminist literary theory for my class tonight.

3. I am TERRIFIED that one of the customers I make fun of in my Retail Wednesday blogposts will read it and come after me.

4. I am so not a poetry fan, but I am finding it the easiest section to teach in my English Composition class.

5. I must end all lists like this on a multiple of five or the WORLD MIGHT END.

Hey, you never know.

So what's your truth today?