*GASP* Yup. Retail Wednesday!

So many ridiculous things happened this week that I simply couldn't NOT do a post. So here it is. Enjoy the bookstore mayhem.

EWWW Award:
R was working in the magazine department and he had a cup of coffee on the library cart he was using to sort the magazines. He had walked away to do something and as he came back he ended up behind an old man who was kind of shuffling his way along the edge of the department.

R followed him patiently, trying to get back to his cart. As the man reached the cart he stopped. Looked down at the coffee.

Yes you see where this is going don't you?

And it's not going to be this cute
see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Picked up the cup, took a nice drink and then put it back and shuffled away while R looked on in horror.

Needless to say R will never leave a cup of coffee out in the open again. Ever.

Not the Brightest Crayon in the Box Award:
Our store is in a shopping plaza shaped something like this:

I seem to have spelled Lowe's wrong. Oops.

I answered the phone on Friday to a rather shrill woman.
Woman: I'm at Michael's on 300. Where are you?
Me: .... (see diagram) Um, we're on the back side of Michael's.
Woman: NO! THAT IS LOWE'S.
Me: No, the same building as Michael's but the back side. The other side.
Woman: (suspiciously) What are you talking about?
Me: We're in the same exact building as Michael's, but on the other side. Around the other side of the building.
Woman: Oh. FINE. (hangs up with vigor)

Phone Freak Award:
I answer the phone and a lady asks if I can check for a couple of books. I ask what she's looking for and inform her that we would have to order the first one that she gives me. So she says she has another one but is pretty sure we won't have it in stock. I take the title and look it up.
Me: It looks like we should have that one here.
Lady: (in shock - not sarcastic, but actual) But it's a new book! Why would you have it in the store!?

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

Me: Well, we usually carry new books.

Lady: I can't believe you would actually have it in the store already. I mean it only came out last week!

Me: (have you ever been to a bookstore before?!) Well, we have it here.

Lady: That's amazing!

I'm telling you, we just can't win!

Misspeller Award:

A woman came up to the customer service desk.

Woman: Do you have Chris Genner's new book?

Me: I'm not familiar with that. (I try a couple of variations on the name) Do you know what the book is called?

Woman: (exasperated) No. It's her new book.

Me: Do you know how her name is spelled?

Woman: (sighs) G-E-N-N-E-R

Me: Nothing is coming up under that.

Woman: You had it here a couple weeks ago. So it has to be here somewhere.

Me: I'm sorry. Do you remember anything of the title?

Woman: (raising her voice) It's by Kris Jenner! K-R-I-S J-E-N-N-E-R!!!!!!

Me: Oh! (type it in, book pops right up) The first time you said "G" so that's why nothing was coming up. (laugh lightly to just make it a humorous misunderstanding)

Woman: WHAT?!

Me: You must have accidentally said "G" instead of "J" the first time. I have it here now though. It looks like we're sold out of it.

Woman: What do you mean I said "G"?

Me: The first time you spelled her name you said G-E-N

Woman: No. Her name is JENNER. J-E-N (glares at me)

Me: Well, I found it here now, and we don't have it. We could order it.

Woman: (Snorts) No. That's all right. (stalks away)

see more Lolcats and funny pictures

All right. That's it for this week, but I will be back next week with more crazy customers!